One of the sites I visit posts assignments to be completed. The one I was greeted by this morning was to tell a secret. I've been sitting here for nearly twenty minutes, drinking my morning coffee, trying to figure out what to write. I've come up with two that I will share. One won't be a secret to my family, but it's something many others don't know. The second isn't so much a secret as a little known fact about me.
First. As much as I want to be neat and organized, I'm just not. Some people are born organized, I think I'm born messy. Last weekend, my brother found a book he had put together in preschool (so about 23 years ago) and next to my "picture" was the caption, "Heather keeps her room messy". I'm not proud of it. And about twice a month, I go on a whirlwind cleaning spree. Now I just need to get into the habit of cleaning in between. And I'm determined to find a way to start filtering clutter out of this apartment!
Second. I'm a seasonal Starbucks addict. Most of the year, I could take or leave them. It's good, but I cringe at spending that much on coffee. Give me a big cup of homebrew with flavored creamer and I'm a happy girl. OK, give me a pot of homebrew and I'm happy. But once September arrives, all I can think about is Starbucks to get a Pumpkin Spice Latte. And I'm already anticipating Gingerbread, the next featured flavor. Sometime after New Years Day, when they run out of flavor syrup, life will go back to normal and Folgers and International Delights will be my best friends again!
Have a great day!
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Monday, September 24, 2007
Two is a fun age!
My daughter has apparently taken after mommy. She is most definitely a talker! We've started to have issues with a couple of phrases she's picked up, but for the most part, it's been fun. If you consider her waking up before the alarm goes off no matter what time it's set for and waking up to "Mommy, want chicken nuggets" before the sun rises to be fun. And if we tell her no chicken nuggets, she'll start the entire list. Normally the order is chicken nuggets, peanut butter, yogurt, eggs, sandwich, pancakes, pretzels, cookies, milk, juice, and cereal.
She's also started to mimic us. When I get done changing her, it's normal for me to ask her to stand up. Now, before I can even get the second tab fastened, she is saying, "Stand up please". Good girl, yes, please stand up!
Now, does anyone know where the off switch is on this little girl?????
*****
In other news, I have been working on devoting time every day to writing, trying to get ready for NaNoWriMo in just over a month. So far, I'm up to about 20,000 words for the week between two stories. Both have been interesting so far, both have minor grains of real life to them, and both have a long way to go. Apparently being talkative isn't just a verbal trait. You can read them on My Creative Outlet. Just remember, I've been back to writing for less than a week, go easy on me!
She's also started to mimic us. When I get done changing her, it's normal for me to ask her to stand up. Now, before I can even get the second tab fastened, she is saying, "Stand up please". Good girl, yes, please stand up!
Now, does anyone know where the off switch is on this little girl?????
*****
In other news, I have been working on devoting time every day to writing, trying to get ready for NaNoWriMo in just over a month. So far, I'm up to about 20,000 words for the week between two stories. Both have been interesting so far, both have minor grains of real life to them, and both have a long way to go. Apparently being talkative isn't just a verbal trait. You can read them on My Creative Outlet. Just remember, I've been back to writing for less than a week, go easy on me!
Sunday, September 23, 2007
I've found one thing I enjoy!
Wow, I've neglected this blog for a long time! Life has been chaotic, to say the least. The good news is that I've found something I truly enjoy and I'm trying to find time every day for myself. I recently started writing again. I feel rusty, but it's great to stretch my mind and let my imagination take me away.
In November, I am going to take part in NaNoWriMo as a challenge to myself. I think that by the end of November, when I have written 50,000 words, I will feel very satisfied and possibly a bit insane. Since I also type for a living, I wonder how my fingers will hold up. That would be the only thing that could keep me from completing this challenge.
In November, I am going to take part in NaNoWriMo as a challenge to myself. I think that by the end of November, when I have written 50,000 words, I will feel very satisfied and possibly a bit insane. Since I also type for a living, I wonder how my fingers will hold up. That would be the only thing that could keep me from completing this challenge.
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Throwing out everything I think I know
I've decided that right now, this is an important thing for me to do. I hate to say it, but I'm beginning to wonder how many of the thoughts running through my head are MY thoughts? I was recently told by a friend that I'm too much of a people pleaser and I would rather back down on my own opinions that fight. I think he was right to an extent. And I don't think it's just the day to day things. I fear it's the big picture things as well.
Last night, I was watching Jay Leno, and that's when this all hit me. First Leo DiCaprio was on talking about his new movie on global warming. My gut reaction was "bah, whatever", but then I realized that no, I think I want to look into this more to see what I think because I have nothing to back up that reaction.
Next guest was Gordon Ramsay. He and Jay were making Gnocchi. My first reaction was "ick" and then I realized I've never TRIED it, so how can I say that? At some point, I'm going to find the recipe they made and I'm going to try it. I had a knee-jerk "ick" reaction to salmon, then my dad made salmon quesadillas and I LOVED them. Never wanted to eat feta cheese, then I tried it in something and loved it. I have no idea where I've gotten the idea that some of these things aren't good, but I'm going to start trying things. Heck, my daughter is less of a picky eater than I am!
The third guest was Fuel. I almost turned the channel because I don't like "that music". After spending the rest of the show wondering about my opinions on things, I listened to it. The song they played was GREAT. Had a good melody, it was definitely hard rock but not shouting, and the words were very moving.
I know that Jay Leno may seem like a strange show to come to a huge decision like this, but sometimes the things that move us come from unlikely places. And I truly believe that watching that show is going to have an impact on my life. Who knows what I will think of things and what my opinions will be a year from now. I have no clue, but I can tell you one thing, they will be the ideas of Heather.
On another note, I can smile again! I had some dental work done yesterday (ALOT) and I finally have a smile I'm proud of again!!!! I feel like that was a very big thing for me to have done because a Heather who has been missing (in my eyes) for a long time is starting to come back to life! I'm a happy person by nature, and I no longer feel like I have to open my mouth as little as possible and if I'm happy about something, I can smile as big and wide as I want and not worry about what others will think! So if you see me walking around town smiling, there may be nothing particularly happy going on, I'm just happy to have that confidence back!
Last night, I was watching Jay Leno, and that's when this all hit me. First Leo DiCaprio was on talking about his new movie on global warming. My gut reaction was "bah, whatever", but then I realized that no, I think I want to look into this more to see what I think because I have nothing to back up that reaction.
Next guest was Gordon Ramsay. He and Jay were making Gnocchi. My first reaction was "ick" and then I realized I've never TRIED it, so how can I say that? At some point, I'm going to find the recipe they made and I'm going to try it. I had a knee-jerk "ick" reaction to salmon, then my dad made salmon quesadillas and I LOVED them. Never wanted to eat feta cheese, then I tried it in something and loved it. I have no idea where I've gotten the idea that some of these things aren't good, but I'm going to start trying things. Heck, my daughter is less of a picky eater than I am!
The third guest was Fuel. I almost turned the channel because I don't like "that music". After spending the rest of the show wondering about my opinions on things, I listened to it. The song they played was GREAT. Had a good melody, it was definitely hard rock but not shouting, and the words were very moving.
I know that Jay Leno may seem like a strange show to come to a huge decision like this, but sometimes the things that move us come from unlikely places. And I truly believe that watching that show is going to have an impact on my life. Who knows what I will think of things and what my opinions will be a year from now. I have no clue, but I can tell you one thing, they will be the ideas of Heather.
On another note, I can smile again! I had some dental work done yesterday (ALOT) and I finally have a smile I'm proud of again!!!! I feel like that was a very big thing for me to have done because a Heather who has been missing (in my eyes) for a long time is starting to come back to life! I'm a happy person by nature, and I no longer feel like I have to open my mouth as little as possible and if I'm happy about something, I can smile as big and wide as I want and not worry about what others will think! So if you see me walking around town smiling, there may be nothing particularly happy going on, I'm just happy to have that confidence back!
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
Dance Like No one's Watching
I figured out another thing that I want to do. I want to dance. Not professionally. I want to get up and dance with Khaila when she hears music on the radio or on TV and can't help but get up and dance. That little girl LOVES to dance and she LOVES music. Two things that make me a very happy mommy!
25 years from now, I want Khaila to think back to when she and mommy used to dance in the living room. Not so much remembering when she was little enough that I had to pick her up, but I want her to remember standing on my feet and the two of us dancing like no one is watching, whether it's just us or the entire family sitting around watching. I know that's one of my treasured memories of growing up!
25 years from now, I want Khaila to think back to when she and mommy used to dance in the living room. Not so much remembering when she was little enough that I had to pick her up, but I want her to remember standing on my feet and the two of us dancing like no one is watching, whether it's just us or the entire family sitting around watching. I know that's one of my treasured memories of growing up!
Friday, August 3, 2007
Depression
It's amazing to me how different people react to depression differently. It does NOT amaze me that people who have problems that need attention don't get help given comments I've been seeing lately regarding Amber on this season of Big Brother. I've seen and heard comments about how annoying her crying is, how fake she is, etc. And I have to admit that I was one of them for a while. Then I watched "Big Brother After Dark" a few nights ago and she was talking about something things in her personal life.
Married at 18, divorced with a little girl by 22. To me, that's significant for a BIG reason. I was "lucky" to not have any kids when I went through my divorce, but I think there are still some issues to be resolved from that. I think that when a marriage fails, it rocks your world. And I feel that 22 is while you are still trying to figure out who in the hell you are as a person. To get married so young, have a child so young, get divorced so young is bound to create or enhance issues.
I've said many times since my divorce that I think getting married at 21 was a mistake. I don't think I was emotionally ready to get married. I think that I would have been better off waiting and figuring out who I was and then finding a man who would complement me rather than falling in love with Mr. Right Now and trying to conform to who he was.
That leads to the next issue that I see. She said she got into a relationship right out of that marriage. Again, not taking the time to figure out who she is. She says she's in love with this man and that he's great to her. I hope she's right. I also hope that she will take the time to get to know HERSELF before she runs off and gets married again.
I have no desire to pick on her for her crying anymore. I think maybe that's because I see too much of myself in her. Luckily while some people picked on the overly sensitive actions, others supported me and urged me to get help. I'm not saying I'm "cured", honestly, I wonder if there is a total cure for depression and the issues it creates. But with the help of my therapist, my doctor, and my family, I am getting through this. Slowly, I'm learning who Heather really is and hope that I'll have a good relationship with myself from here on out!
If you see someone in obvious pain, don't pick, pick them up! Support them. Urge them to get help so they can be happy and be the best person they can be! Mental illness is not something to pick on or laugh at, it's serious business. Sometimes there are other reasons for what you are seeing and someone needs you to see those reasons and nudge them.
Married at 18, divorced with a little girl by 22. To me, that's significant for a BIG reason. I was "lucky" to not have any kids when I went through my divorce, but I think there are still some issues to be resolved from that. I think that when a marriage fails, it rocks your world. And I feel that 22 is while you are still trying to figure out who in the hell you are as a person. To get married so young, have a child so young, get divorced so young is bound to create or enhance issues.
I've said many times since my divorce that I think getting married at 21 was a mistake. I don't think I was emotionally ready to get married. I think that I would have been better off waiting and figuring out who I was and then finding a man who would complement me rather than falling in love with Mr. Right Now and trying to conform to who he was.
That leads to the next issue that I see. She said she got into a relationship right out of that marriage. Again, not taking the time to figure out who she is. She says she's in love with this man and that he's great to her. I hope she's right. I also hope that she will take the time to get to know HERSELF before she runs off and gets married again.
I have no desire to pick on her for her crying anymore. I think maybe that's because I see too much of myself in her. Luckily while some people picked on the overly sensitive actions, others supported me and urged me to get help. I'm not saying I'm "cured", honestly, I wonder if there is a total cure for depression and the issues it creates. But with the help of my therapist, my doctor, and my family, I am getting through this. Slowly, I'm learning who Heather really is and hope that I'll have a good relationship with myself from here on out!
If you see someone in obvious pain, don't pick, pick them up! Support them. Urge them to get help so they can be happy and be the best person they can be! Mental illness is not something to pick on or laugh at, it's serious business. Sometimes there are other reasons for what you are seeing and someone needs you to see those reasons and nudge them.
Thursday, August 2, 2007
Better safe than sorry...
In light of the Minneapolis bridge collapse yesterday, I went in and updated my phonebook in my cell. Do you have an ICE contact? Granted it's not going to be the first thing rescue crews will do when on the scene of an emergency, but it may help them contact family once you are in route to the hospital or at the hospital should something happen. I have two ICE contacts, my dad's and my stepmom's cell phones. I have their home phone under Dad and my mom's under Mom, more contacts that are easily identifiable. I have my home number in there so they can call my house. I have my husband's work number in there under Hubby work because they won't know who Rick is, but they'll probably understand Hubby.
Do you have a CHAD sticker on any carseats you own? This will allow emergency workers to have information on your child in case of an accident. You can find more information at the website listed below. The program is named after an infant named Chad who was in an accident and they had no idea who he was. Luckily an emergency room nurse recognized him and they could contact his parents, but most people wouldn't be so lucky. They're free and you never know if they may save your child's life if something should happen. Yes, it sounds like an exaggeration but think about it, if you're in an accident and unconscious or worse, or if your child is with someone other than you, what will happen? I'd rather be safe than sorry!
http://www.mindspring.com/~tpatxdiv/chad.htm
Do you have a CHAD sticker on any carseats you own? This will allow emergency workers to have information on your child in case of an accident. You can find more information at the website listed below. The program is named after an infant named Chad who was in an accident and they had no idea who he was. Luckily an emergency room nurse recognized him and they could contact his parents, but most people wouldn't be so lucky. They're free and you never know if they may save your child's life if something should happen. Yes, it sounds like an exaggeration but think about it, if you're in an accident and unconscious or worse, or if your child is with someone other than you, what will happen? I'd rather be safe than sorry!
http://www.mindspring.com/~tpatxdiv/chad.htm
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